Enforced Optimism

I've been feeling a bit shit lately.

I've been crazy, and hormonal, and mostly i've been sick – there's been a horrible flu going around, and i've had it for 10 days so far. Finally got myself to the doctor today (after deciding my body wasn't going to get rid of it for me), who gave me antibiotics and suggested eucalyptus steams to help with the congestion.

Well, I just spilled the boiling water all over my feet.

Anyway, I've had a good cry and now i'm done feeling sorry for myself, so here's a list of awesome things that I am excited about!

• In just two sittings, I have annihalated the first (and so far only) season of an AWESOME British series called My Mad Fat Diary.
  
  
  
  It is so great, and for so many of us: totally relatable. It's very teen angsty, and they totally NAILED the balance between comedy and drama... there were more than a few “laugh out loud” moments, and I cried multiple times in the last episode.
  Plus, there is a GREAT soundtrack consisting of The Smiths and Radiohead (both bands i've never been an especially big fan of, but who work amazingly in the show), and BJORK! And now I remember how much I love her, and am listening to all her live albums on Spotify (which i've never done before). By the way, did you know her name is pronounced like “Byerk”... i've been saying “Byork” all these years.
  Oh, and one last amazing thing about MMFD before I finish this rant – Sharon Rooney. She plays the main character, Rae, and I think I have a new girl crush. She is SUCH A CHAMP. Here she is being cute:
  
  
  
  
  
  Here she is being awesome:

          And here she is being a LOLFEST:

The woman, is a comedic genius. I hope to meet her one day.

On with the list:

• On the weekend, I am finally going to make it to a local market to visit a stall called “Hey Fatty”. They specialise in vintage and offbeat fashions for, well, fatties! So excited to drop some cash on them! Here's their website: http://www.heyfatty.com.au/
• Today, even though I was sick and couldn't sing, Jake and I had a band meeting, and i'm totally amped to get back into it. We've just about finished another new song, which brings our original set length up to half an hour, and possibly contains a good chunk of the tracks we will release on our Demo EP. It just redirects to a facebook page at the moment, but here is us: https://www.facebook.com/ZombieScooterClub
  At time of post, we have 83 likes! Huzzah!
• I paid off another $1000 on my credit card. Which brings the balance extraordinarily low, and is something I am SO STOKED about, because I have been working really hard to get rid of my debt asap. Never doing that again.
• I wanted to be able to say: I JUST BOUGHT MY FIRST BIKINI. But I didn't – but only because I have to borrow my housemate's tape measure to determine the best size, but I WILL in the morning! Seriously! Unless they sell out overnight (which is always possible), I AM ORDERING MY FIRST BIKINI!! It's from a collection designed by Gabi Fresh, who is a fashion BEAST (blog: http://www.gabifresh.com/), and available through http://www.swimsuitsforall.com/
  In fact, it's THIS exact one! It's modelled by Nadia Aboulhosn (http://nadiaaboulhosn.com/) who is also an INSANE BABE!!
  
  
  
  Oh and here's Gabi herself wearing it! *swoooooon*
  
  
  
  
  
  I can't wait to get mine. I'm going to do a backyard shoot in it!

Ok, i'm so happy and excited again.

Time for sleep.

Goodnight to everyone and no-one.

EDIT: CONFIRMED - I DID IT! JUST PLACED MY ORDER FOR THE GABI FRESH GALAXY PRINT BIKINI!!!

SECOND EDIT: swimsuitsforall have a HORRIBLY MEAN website that let me buy something that was already SOLD OUT. Rude. No galaxy bikini for me :'(

Status: Pending

Well there goes my resolution to blog regularly. Yep. Ah well... i'm here now.

Things have been happening. Big things. My world is yagoogely.

Firstly, my bestie was pretty ill (hospitalised twice) with a mystery illness. She is ok now, but it really threw our world. As a result, we had to postpone (hopefully not indefinitely?) our Toddlers and Tiaras themed combined birthday party. Boo hoo!

Secondly, I left my permanent office job to do casual work. This is a big thing for me, leaving the security and predictability of a regular 9 to 5 job. I used to know exactly when I was working, and more importantly, how much money I was going to have, and I could set my life to a timepiece. Now, for the first time in many years, I don't have that. And it's a bit scary.

But it's also exciting, because it has reminded me that I am, first and foremost, an artist. I have a casual job that is not rigid and does not demand all of my attention, because I WANT to commit myself to a life of expression and creativity. It's what i've always wanted. I just got lost in the easy road of “security” these last few years.

The other big thing is that I joined a dating site. Putting aside the excitement and nerves of actually meeting cute boys, it is actually a really big thing for me to process the act of “putting myself on the market”. I mean, I know it's not this black and white, but I have worked so hard over the last couple of years to be independent and self-sufficient, i'm struggling with the concept of opening myself up romantically to someone, without considering it seeking validation or 'completion'.

So, current status = reprogramming myself to consider a potential special someone as “an additional bonus” and not a complete affront to my personal freedom.

THINGS I AM CURRENTLY WORKING ON!

My band (Zombie Scooter Club) is working on a little film clip in which I get to dress as a glamrock Steel Panther fan. So I am making an awesome t-shirt for that! Think glitter lettering, fur shoulders, and CHAIN.

My other goal at the moment is to sort out my camera situation, and organise my space so I have somewhere to start taking same OOTD photos, because BOY have I been coming out with some crackers lately! I think it's because I ADORE colder weather, and it really inspires my wardrobe.

Oh, I also just found this photo, and I quite like it. Especially considering I don't usually like open-mouthed smiling photos of myself. (Also I haven't posted a photo on here yet, so I probs should).